Death Eater's Union
by emikae
Summary: Lord V.'s been recruiting union crazed Americans. What shall happen?Ties in with Correspondence. Holiday story.
1. Christmas

The Christmas Letter

Disclamier: Not mine. Slight spin off of my Correspondence. Very slight. Sort of.

­-0-

Lord Voldemort was having a bad day. First it had snowed. Snow was usually a good thing for him. Ever since the Weasley twins had bounced snowballs off of his face all those years ago at Hogwarts, he'd been doing the same to his Death Eaters.

Severus hated it.

But they'd all gotten together and formed a Death Eater's Union- He'd known he shouldn't have started recruiting Americans, but there simply hadn't been enough British Wizards. And the Death Eater's Union had demamded better hours and holidays off.

So instead of having them at his manor for Christmas they'd all gone over to the Malfoy's. Damn purebloods.

And after that they'd told him he could come if he wanted, but it was a fancy dress party and he hated fancy dress parties. There were only so many times one could be Count Dracula.

So here he was without Death Eaters all by himself. Nagini had gone and stuffed herself on rats, so she was off napping and digesting.

He though she'd eaten Pettigrew too. Now he didn't have a personal slave. He had hated how Peter had whined though.

The Death Eater's Union had demanded that they get the day's inbetween Christmas and New Year's off as well.

He made a meantal note to kill all the Americans and their silly unions.

An owl swooped in the window. "What now?" Voldemort asked. "Do they want Valentine's Day off to cavort naked through Hogwart's Great Hall?"

The snowy owl dropped a package in his lap and a letter.

Voldemort didn't notice the letter at because the corner of the package had landed on his right ball.

"ow..." He said.

After recovering from his pain, and finding the letter, he opened it.

_Dear Lord Voldmort-  
Merry Christmas. I hope that you are having fun, but from the feelings that I got from our shared link it appears that you're not. Hermione and I got together and made some peanut brittle and toffee. I hope that you enjoy it. The mug and hot cocoa mix is from Ron, he doesn't know that it's for you, and the book is a muggle children's tale that we'd though you'd enjoy.  
Hope you enjoy it!  
-Harry Potter. _

Lord Voldemort stared at the box incredulosly. He pulled out a book and smiled. There was a green character on the cover and it read "How the Grinch Stole Christmas".

Cute. Perhaps he'd read it. After he had some of the hot cocoa. Caramel cocoa? Sounded lovely. He took the mug and the packet into the kitchen and made some. Coming back, and burning his hand in the process, Voldemort sat down to read the book.

-0-

Voldemort was happy. Even though his ball still hurt where the corner of the book had hit him, and his hand smarted a little, he was happy. Perhaps Christmas wasn't so bad after all.

-0-

Merry Christmas if you celebrate it. This is a slight spin off of Correspondence. If you haven't read it, and you ejoyed this, you'd probably like Correspondence too. Thanks for reading.


	2. Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day!  
OR  
A Slight Undertone of A Sugar-High Lord Voldemort

It was Valentine's Day, and Lord Voldemort was, once again, not having a good day. Once again the Death Eater's Union had decided to ruin his day.

He'd had a nice day all planned out, starting with a short meeting at nine in the morning, and ending with a lovely ball around seven. He'd even gone to all the trouble to bring in unsuspecting muggles for some torture sessions around noon. Not to mention the pounds of sweets that he'd brought in. Practically a whole lorry full.

But, no. the Death Eater's Union had to go and decide that they wanted this holiday off too. It was really too much of them, to ask for another holiday off. Especially as it was so soon after New Year's.

Then the bloody Americans who started the damned union had wanted a four day weekend on top of it all. Lord Voldemort was not having a good day.

On the plus side, a shipment of Snape's potions were due in today, and they included a couple of love potions. Voldemort had been planning on pranking some Death Eaters that night. And he did have a rather large amount of sugary sweets to eat his way through.

Perhaps Harry Potter was being a bad influence on him.

Perhaps, it was high time that the Lord Voldemort unbutton his shirt a little. Or was that even the right phrase. Perhaps it was untie your trousers. Hm, he'd have to owl Harry.

_Harry-  
As the Death Eater's Union have demanded that they have this holiday off (St. Valentine's Day), I would like to formally invite you to a small get-together this evening around seven. I had plundered some cakes and sweets for a ball, but the Death Eaters have decided to skive off and I have no company for tonight.  
I've sent this by express hawk and she shall wait for a response.  
Cheers!  
-Lord Voldemort_

Harry set the letter down and looked at Hermione.

"What do you say to a little fun tonight?" He asked.

"No Harry, Draco and I are quite fine together." Hermione replied.

"No, not that kind." Harry said, "No, your Uncle has invited us to a small get-together today in honor of the holiday that his co-workers are taking."

"They're doing that again?" Hermione asked. "I thought they'd learned after Christmas." She said.

"Apparently the American are taking over." Harry said. "Tell Draco, I'll owl your uncle and tell him that we'll be there."

_Lord Voldemort-  
We'd be happy to attend your party this evening. Expect us around seven.  
-Harry, Hermione, and Drakie-poo_

"Oh lovely!" The Dark Lord proclaimed. "Fluffball! We shall be having guests this evening! Go on with the party preparations!"

The house elf squeaked, rather frightened of it's person in such an odd mood.

-0-

"So, what shall we do first?" Lord Voldemort asked. "Play Prank the Weasel, Prank the Coot, Spin the Bottle, Torture the Muggles, or Pin the Poison on the Union?"

"The last one sounds rather fun." Harry said.

"Lovely!" Lord Voldemort said, as he scooped yet another handful of candy up and began eating it.

Lord Voldemort brought out a handful of bottles of a green liquid in a rather pointy bottle. "Hold these." He handed them to Harry.

"O..K." Harry replied.

"I know I left it in here somewhere," Lord Voldemort muttered, rooting around in the drawer. "Found it!" He'd pulled out a photo with the Death Eater's proudly proclaiming their new union status.

"Now, what you do is you stick the poison bottles into the picture and you try to hit as many union buggers as possible. Have fun!" Lord Voldemort said.


End file.
